Some people get to have drinks with umbrellas. We get cupcakes!
Sweet!
Friday, April 23 - The Apology
This was shared with me by a teacher who had reprimanded a third grader for hitting another child. She had him write a letter of apology.
Dear .............................,
I'm sorry for touching you. I could
made another choice. 1 count backward from 10
2 think of something plesant. 3 Drain my
anger out 4 find somthing to punch. But
for my disison was I diserve a punishm
ent, and this is my diserve missing
resses. I know what I did is wrong
and I hope I choose something else
to do if I'm angry. You are a great
friend and I respect that . I know you
will be a great leader and make the
world a better place. Follow good deeds
and orders and you will be a great
leader. I bileve in you, forever.
Wish you luck!
PS Hope you find this note exepible
for the apoligey.
Sensealy,
.............................
Dear .............................,
I'm sorry for touching you. I could
made another choice. 1 count backward from 10
2 think of something plesant. 3 Drain my
anger out 4 find somthing to punch. But
for my disison was I diserve a punishm
ent, and this is my diserve missing
resses. I know what I did is wrong
and I hope I choose something else
to do if I'm angry. You are a great
friend and I respect that . I know you
will be a great leader and make the
world a better place. Follow good deeds
and orders and you will be a great
leader. I bileve in you, forever.
Wish you luck!
PS Hope you find this note exepible
for the apoligey.
Sensealy,
.............................
Friday, April 16 - What's It Gonna Cost Ya?
After those hand blow dryers were installed in the student bathrooms to cut down on costs - and mess - one little girl came out of the bathroom and told the aftercare workers -
"Do you know they charge a quarter for a paper towel now?"
If she put a quarter in she'd be very disappointed. It's empty. It's the Kotex machine that hasn't been used in years due to grade level changes in the school. It's still there on the wall though. Much easier that way. Then no one has to patch the wall, or paint it for that matter. Just a piece of metallic history.
"Do you know they charge a quarter for a paper towel now?"
If she put a quarter in she'd be very disappointed. It's empty. It's the Kotex machine that hasn't been used in years due to grade level changes in the school. It's still there on the wall though. Much easier that way. Then no one has to patch the wall, or paint it for that matter. Just a piece of metallic history.
Friday, April 9 - I See Dead Squirrels
A call to the office:
Teacher: "Just wanted to report there's a dead squirrel next to the gazebo."
Secretary: "Okay. We'll get the custodian to remove it."
Secretary calls the custodian on the walkie-talkie: "There's a dead squirrel next to the gazebo."
Custodian: "Okay. I'll take care of it."
Custodian calls the secretary: "Where did you say the squirrel was?"
Secretary: "Between the school and the gazebo. Why?"
Custodian: "I don't see any dead squirrels."
Secretary: "Let me call the teacher."
Secretary to teacher: "Where did you see the squirrel? The custodian can't find it."
Teacher to class: "Class, where did the squirrel go?"
Class: "The custodian took it."
Teacher to secretary: "They said the custodian took it."
Secretary: "He didn't take it. He can't find it."
Teacher: "Well, they TOLD me it was dead."
What I wanted to say: "And you called without looking?"
Teacher: "Just wanted to report there's a dead squirrel next to the gazebo."
Secretary: "Okay. We'll get the custodian to remove it."
Secretary calls the custodian on the walkie-talkie: "There's a dead squirrel next to the gazebo."
Custodian: "Okay. I'll take care of it."
Custodian calls the secretary: "Where did you say the squirrel was?"
Secretary: "Between the school and the gazebo. Why?"
Custodian: "I don't see any dead squirrels."
Secretary: "Let me call the teacher."
Secretary to teacher: "Where did you see the squirrel? The custodian can't find it."
Teacher to class: "Class, where did the squirrel go?"
Class: "The custodian took it."
Teacher to secretary: "They said the custodian took it."
Secretary: "He didn't take it. He can't find it."
Teacher: "Well, they TOLD me it was dead."
What I wanted to say: "And you called without looking?"
Friday, March 26 - Budgets, Damn Budgets
It's been an interesting month. I've attended three Board of Education meetings in the last three weeks, all of them dealing with our school budget.
Due to major cuts in state financial aid, our BoE had to come up with $2.5M in cuts. Half of that was a surprise and they had less than 28 hours to come up with sufficient cuts to make up the difference.
My job could be in jeopardy, but thus far I am safe. Some of the cuts that were made are still being reviewed and of course, if they should be reinstated, the money will have to come from elsewhere.
I won't go into much more detail other than to say that the Governor of New Jersey and the State Commissioner of Education are very good at putting out propaganda. I dare say that they've not had very good teachers of their own otherwise they would realize that their math skills are sadly lacking. Not to mention the failure to give accurate and complete information to the public.
The final budget hearing is this Wednesday night and I will know definitively at that point if I will still be employed after this contract year.
What scares me though is one of the cuts that they've already made. They've cut the copy clerk. Yes, our district has a centralized copy center that our teachers send their copywork to. The clerk takes care of the copywork for our four schools. Our individual school copiers are supposed to be used for emergency purposes only. I repeat "supposed" to be.
The plan is that they will send the two big copiers to the two biggest schools, and the two smaller schools, one of which is the one I work in, will be using their own machines.
I asked my principal who exactly would be doing this copywork and he said that he would have the teachers do their own. This is the plan for the district.
Now here is why I'm scared. I have a lot of respect for teachers, but sometimes I find that they do not necessarily make the best students. Especially when the job is out of their comfort zone or expertise. They will have to be "trained" in the proper use of the copy machine. This will be easy for some and beyond the dignity of others.
When I first started working in this office there was a copier in the faculty room for the teachers. At one point someone came into the office and said it wasn't working. They had been trying to make an overhead and the overheads just kept disappearing in the machine. So they gave up and came to ask us to make one on the office copier. Upon inspection of the faculty copier, it would no longer make copies of any kind so the service tech had to be called. When he brought up the hunk of plastic that was found inside the machine we could only joke that someone had been trying to make jewelry in the copier.
Now there will be terms like "collated" and "uncollated", "double-sided from double-sided" and "double-sided from single-sided", "sorted"or "stacked". These terms, while simple in theory need you to really think through the job. And yes, they have had to indicate some of these on the forms that they are now sending to the copy center, but the trick now will be to actually match it up with the function of the machine.
I am scared because some of them are having difficulty operating a coffee pot without making a mess and now they'll be expected to operate a machine worth thousands of dollars.
Do you think I'm worrying for nothing? How long before this becomes part of my job?
Due to major cuts in state financial aid, our BoE had to come up with $2.5M in cuts. Half of that was a surprise and they had less than 28 hours to come up with sufficient cuts to make up the difference.
My job could be in jeopardy, but thus far I am safe. Some of the cuts that were made are still being reviewed and of course, if they should be reinstated, the money will have to come from elsewhere.
I won't go into much more detail other than to say that the Governor of New Jersey and the State Commissioner of Education are very good at putting out propaganda. I dare say that they've not had very good teachers of their own otherwise they would realize that their math skills are sadly lacking. Not to mention the failure to give accurate and complete information to the public.
The final budget hearing is this Wednesday night and I will know definitively at that point if I will still be employed after this contract year.
What scares me though is one of the cuts that they've already made. They've cut the copy clerk. Yes, our district has a centralized copy center that our teachers send their copywork to. The clerk takes care of the copywork for our four schools. Our individual school copiers are supposed to be used for emergency purposes only. I repeat "supposed" to be.
The plan is that they will send the two big copiers to the two biggest schools, and the two smaller schools, one of which is the one I work in, will be using their own machines.
I asked my principal who exactly would be doing this copywork and he said that he would have the teachers do their own. This is the plan for the district.
Now here is why I'm scared. I have a lot of respect for teachers, but sometimes I find that they do not necessarily make the best students. Especially when the job is out of their comfort zone or expertise. They will have to be "trained" in the proper use of the copy machine. This will be easy for some and beyond the dignity of others.
When I first started working in this office there was a copier in the faculty room for the teachers. At one point someone came into the office and said it wasn't working. They had been trying to make an overhead and the overheads just kept disappearing in the machine. So they gave up and came to ask us to make one on the office copier. Upon inspection of the faculty copier, it would no longer make copies of any kind so the service tech had to be called. When he brought up the hunk of plastic that was found inside the machine we could only joke that someone had been trying to make jewelry in the copier.
Now there will be terms like "collated" and "uncollated", "double-sided from double-sided" and "double-sided from single-sided", "sorted"or "stacked". These terms, while simple in theory need you to really think through the job. And yes, they have had to indicate some of these on the forms that they are now sending to the copy center, but the trick now will be to actually match it up with the function of the machine.
I am scared because some of them are having difficulty operating a coffee pot without making a mess and now they'll be expected to operate a machine worth thousands of dollars.
Do you think I'm worrying for nothing? How long before this becomes part of my job?
Friday, March 19 - Messages for the Principal
File this under "Things I Never Thought I Would Have to Write in a Message to My Principal":
Mr. Smith sent Joseph to the office because Joseph grabbed Henry by the breasts and twisted them.
Mr. Smith sent Joseph to the office because Joseph grabbed Henry by the breasts and twisted them.
Friday, March 12 - K-Cups
We got a new coffee pot for the staff to use. It's one of the Keurig pots and we basically got the pot for free from the supplier and each teacher orders their own box of K-cups that they keep in their room and brew when they want. I sent out a brief e-mail to the staff with some guidelines regarding the use of the coffee pot, including not leaving the water chamber empty for the next person, clean-up, etc. The "goodwill" that this new machine brought lasted about one day.
"Someone's not throwing their K-cup away when they're done" I was told. (So you take it out and throw it away when you throw yours away.)
"They're going to burn out the heating element if they don't put water in" was another comment. (The machine is programmed not to let that happen. If it breaks, we'll call the company."
"We need a garbage can near the coffee pot so we remember to throw away the K-cups." (The garbage can is 20 feet away. Why should the custodian have to empty a wastebasket into a garbage can in the same room?)
I wonder what a teacher in their classroom would do if they put a new, let's see.........., a new electric pencil sharpener in their room and they started getting complaints like.....
"Tommy's point broke off his pencil in the sharpener and he left it there."
"Cindy didn't empty the sharpener when she was done. She said the garbage can was too far away."
I think they'd get tired of these complaints really fast.
And so did I.
So here is the e-mail I sent to the staff in an effort to keep it humorous:
Subject: K-Cups
No, this is not the start of some dirty joke – however, I’ve been “notified” (several times) that someone is leaving their K-Cups in the coffee pot for the next person to throw away. Since you can bring in your K-Cups from home if you have them, I’m sharing this with everyone and not pointing any fingers.
This is new and I’m sure we’ll all get better at it.
You know I really don’t want to have to be the “Coffee Police” because then I’d also have to remind you to fill the water reservoir up when it gets low and don’t leave that for the next person to do.
Okay, done now. Have a great day!!!
Coffee anyone?
"Someone's not throwing their K-cup away when they're done" I was told. (So you take it out and throw it away when you throw yours away.)
"They're going to burn out the heating element if they don't put water in" was another comment. (The machine is programmed not to let that happen. If it breaks, we'll call the company."
"We need a garbage can near the coffee pot so we remember to throw away the K-cups." (The garbage can is 20 feet away. Why should the custodian have to empty a wastebasket into a garbage can in the same room?)
I wonder what a teacher in their classroom would do if they put a new, let's see.........., a new electric pencil sharpener in their room and they started getting complaints like.....
"Tommy's point broke off his pencil in the sharpener and he left it there."
"Cindy didn't empty the sharpener when she was done. She said the garbage can was too far away."
I think they'd get tired of these complaints really fast.
And so did I.
So here is the e-mail I sent to the staff in an effort to keep it humorous:
Subject: K-Cups
No, this is not the start of some dirty joke – however, I’ve been “notified” (several times) that someone is leaving their K-Cups in the coffee pot for the next person to throw away. Since you can bring in your K-Cups from home if you have them, I’m sharing this with everyone and not pointing any fingers.
This is new and I’m sure we’ll all get better at it.
You know I really don’t want to have to be the “Coffee Police” because then I’d also have to remind you to fill the water reservoir up when it gets low and don’t leave that for the next person to do.
Okay, done now. Have a great day!!!
Coffee anyone?
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